5. The Art of Asking

5. The Art of Asking; or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Let People Help by Amanda Palmer

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Read this and you'll face your feelings about asking, receiving, art, art's value, artists, and Imposter Syndrome. Though Palmer's musings on asking come in large part from her experiences as a busker and musician trying to make a living, a lot of it's universal.

It's also a book of relationships, with intimate details of her life with husband, Neil Gaiman, and her best friend, Anthony.

My feelings about asking are complicated. I've had some unexpected yes'es and several soul crushing no's. The worst no's were for intangible things, like support or distraction. They were unspoken no's; people just never responded. Did I not offer them enough in exchange? I'd tried but perhaps didn't accept they they didn't want my support and time and attention. Or in one case for a person who did want my support, wasn't ready to accept that they only wanted a one-way street to them.

Amanda writes, "If you love people enough, they'll give you everything," a quote from her friend Anthony if I remember correctly. That hasn't been my experience, but I think the takeaway is that I haven't found/cultivated the right crowd to ask. Too bad I'm an introvert.


A year ago on TTaT: Superman's Girl Friend Lois Lane Archives, Volume 1