22 July 2006

Two no's

It hardly seems fair. Yesterday, in addition to the wedding invite I received a couple days earlier, I received another for a party the night before and brunch the day after that requires another RSVP, this time by phone or email.

As I've said before, you shouldn't have to attend the wedding of someone to whom you were once engaged. Especially when your invite doesn't include a "plus one" option, and the only people you'll know at the wedding are the bride and groom and your ex's parents. That's just not a recipe for good times.

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  1. Right-o. It's more the explaining why I'm not going that I'm not looking forward to once my answer is received. With any luck, I'm just over-thinking it.

  2. Don't worry - most times when I worry about explaining why I "cannot" come, I end up never having to do it - most people either understand completely well - and sympathize - or they really don't make a big deal out of it...

    This one is pretty obvious - and you don't have to go into detailes.

    I would not go to that party - I would rather have to explain to my friend why I'm not there than to have to tell a lot of strangers stuff along the line of: "Oh you're the cousin, okay, eh.., I'm the ex, I'm here because ... eh well, I just couldn't say no to this invite... "

    (Am I being harsh? - I mean well!)

  3. I'm torn. I think you should go to the wedding because I selfishly want to read about the horribleness of it later. But then I think you shouldn't go...you know, on account of the horribleness.

  4. i so would not want to go either. the gesture is nice but the reality bites.

  5. Rarity: Your imagined dialogue made me laugh. If I were to go, I believe I'd go with: "I'm an old friend from college."

    Jason: lol. I don't think it'd be that horrible if I went...ya know, just a total drag where I don't know enough people to have a good time. So if it won't even make good blog fodder, there's really no good reason to go. ;)

    Sizz: so true. The reality is that seeing an ex get married is not even the main issue here. It's about one apology I'll never get and a friendship based in a residual familiarity- an assumption of my loyalty in a way- that at our last meetings left me feeling entirely taken for granted. There's just not enough there there if you get my meaning.

  6. Feh! Consider what you would have spent on transportation/clothes/hotel to attend this wedding, then RSVP your "no thanks", and then spend the money on a nice spa day for yourself.

    I highly recommend a nice facial and a reflexology foot massage. ;-)