06 June 2016

How am I not myself?

The other night I went out to dinner with my parents at an old drive up restaurant. Which is to say, you drive up, peruse the menu painted across the edge of the overhang, get out of your car, walk to one of the windows, place your order, get a poker chip with a faded number written on it in Sharpie, and then wait for them to call your number to go pick up your food.

It was sunny and rather warm. I left my sunglasses on when I walked up to order and was surprised by just how out of character it felt. I can't think of another time I've done that. Surely I must have at some point but certainly not in the past 10 years. It just feels disrespectful to leave your sunglasses on when you're talking to someone. I was just so tired that night I left them on.


I was standing in the garden section of a Super Walmart doing some mobility stretches while I waited. My left shoulder had been in a lot of pain not long ago but doing pec stretches really helped, so I continue to do them for a couple minutes here and there throughout the day as I try to get the final kinks out.

The thing is, it's an aggressive looking stretch. You clasp your hands behind your back, roll your shoulders back and straighten your arms. Then you lift up your arms as much as you can and/or bring your palms together to increase the stretch.

The flip side of having your arms behind you is that it thrusts your breasts forward in a probably provocative fashion.

There weren't many people around, so I was just staying out of the way and counting out two minutes in my head.

After that stretch, I still had time so I tried a yoga pose where you do prayer hands behind your back. That is, hands palm to palm facing down and then you flip them around so they are facing up against your back between your shoulder blades. After the pec stretch, this wasn't that bad.

A young woman with long black hair and a blue Walmart vest on said something to me. She was about ten feet away and I assumed she was asking if I needed help with anything.

"I'm fine, thanks," I said.

Then she said something else that I didn't catch because I wasn't paying attention except to realize I'd probably mistaken the first thing she'd said.

"Wait, what?" I said, bringing my attention to her, and dropping my hands to my sides.

I missed the first part of what she said but caught, "You're just staring out over the flowers?" She smiled at me.

"Oh, I'm just waiting for my parents," I said, gesturing to the checkout area.

"That makes sense," she said and then started watering some flowers with a sprayer attached to a hose.

Yup, that was the least cool thing I could've said. Now that's like me.

11 years ago on TTaT: tip of the week- opening stuck windows

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