26 May 2009

Where are the bears when you need them?

Or the fox, owl, or crows? Any scavengers really.

I was really hoping that some animal would come along and take the dead mouse from my driveway. I could take a picture to show you, but I'll spare y'all the image currently burned into my brain.

If it had died in a trap in the garage, I would've dealt with it right off, but I had nothing to do with this mouse's demise. Technically, I didn't set the traps in the garage either, but whatever. What I'm saying is: why did this mouse have to drop dead in my driveway?!

If the animals don't want it, I certainly don't want to touch it even with gloves or bags or what have you. I find myself theorizing ways to not contaminate the shovel or spade, but I'm not remotely optimistic about it.

Hmm, maybe I could use one to slide it onto the other. The dead mouse is between two vehicles now, so I'm envisioning some potential slapstick comedy from a bystander's perspective.

And then there's how to store it until tomorrow when the trash is picked up. (I'm writing this Monday night.) I do not want to deal with it first thing in the morning in my pajamas when I haul the trash cans to the curb.

Well, if I'm going to do it, I better get started before it gets too dark. Yuck.


30 MINUTES LATER:

Two pieces of cardboard triple-bagged did the gross trick. When I came in, I went all OCD scrubbing my hands and arms up to my elbows. If my sink was at a more convenient height, I'd probably still be there, but my back was starting to ache.

I still sort of want to disinfect my entire body and my clothes, but part of my brain knows that really would be overkill, so I'm resisting the urge to take another shower today.

Think I'll go play some DDR to reset my brain. Ooh, and then I can make myself a smoothie. I've fuckin' earned it.


A year ago on TTaT: Ah, Memorial Day redux

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