29 June 2006

Safe and Sound

I'm back from having lunch with the one and only, Citizen of the Month. Many people have theorized that Sophia is merely a figment of Neil's imagination. I'm here to tell you that's just not true: Neil is the figment. Sophia is a tremendously talented and insightful writer exploring and revealing the male psyche through humor. Who would've guessed?

Leafy trees

OK, maybe not, but it amused me to consider the possibility that someone would create such an elaborate secret identity.

In truth, I had an enjoyable lunch with Neil and Sophia. It was fun meeting them both and set an excellent precedent as my first blogger encounter. I hope I made a favorable impression. I was myself, of that much I'm certain.

It's strange to me that anticipating meeting new people should make me anxious, whereas I'm relatively at ease during the actual meeting (as long as there aren't too many people). What's that anxiety about anyway? Fear of being disliked, having nothing to say, boredom, disliking someone else, feeling clutzy, not good enough, wearing the wrong clothes, saying the wrong thing, offending someone? As I get older, most of these things don't concern me that much or even cross my mind at all when I feel anxious. Maybe it's been reduced to a Pavlovian response to the idea of interacting with new people, a vestige of shyness that at one time had more substantial roots. If that's the case, I should be able to train myself out of it, but I suspect that would require meeting a lot more people which still feels a bit daunting.

Maybe I'm transferring my large group anxiety to all cases of new people. At a party, it can feel like you're competing for people's attention. If you're not entertaining enough, they'll listen to someone better, while trying to be 'on' is jarring to my temperament. One of the things I love about writing is that I can get my whole thought out sans interruption even if it's a bit involved to express. Hmm.

One year ago at TTaT: A Prelude to Bewitched
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4 comments :

  1. You know something? Your revelation about Neil being the figment makes perfect sense. Hindsight being 20/20 and all that.

    Can I just resort to calling him Sophia?

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  2. That's awesome! Hope you guys had a great time.

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  3. Kevin: Doesn't it though? Every comic duo needs its "straight man," but what if the 'straight man' was you? Then you'd have to invent the other half. It's an idea I like quite a lot.

    And you'd have to ask him, uh... her, about using Sophia instead. ;)

    Michele: I'm glad I put my hermit tendencies aside for an afternoon; it was well worth it.

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  4. I think Kapgar is right -- maybe Neil (and his penis) and the whole site is an elaborate creative writing effort by Sophia. Hints about not inviting a mother-in-law on trips, articles aplenty referencing The Gilmore Girls, complaints about where Neil chooses to go to eat... If you read the site from that point of view, it certainly gives you a new (and interesting) perspective.

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