03 May 2011

I am a relaxation ninja.

That's the goal anyway. I find myself at a point in my life where anxiety and stress are impacting me physically in a more pronounced way, so it behooves me to learn how to shut that mental nonsense the fuck down pronto when it crops up.

My chief weapon is surprise, surprise and fear, fear and surprise. My *two* weapons are fear and surprise, and ruthless efficiency. Our *three* weapons are...no wait, I seem to have gone astray.

Amongst my weaponry are such elements as:

Take a ten minute walk. Outside, if you please, at least until the pollen, bugs, heat and humidity become unbearable. I have to be able to take strides long enough to actually stretch my legs at a good clip for it to be worthwhile. Harder to do inside because of my height. Treadmill as last resort. DDR is actually a better choice because it can make me laugh.

Breathe deep. When you find your breath is all shallow and fast, take in more air and slow it down.

Think relaxed. Shoulders up by your ears? Drop them down. Remember what your muscles feel like when relaxed and try to make your body adopt that sensation.

Say, "I am a relaxation ninja." To yourself or out loud, doesn't matter. Picture it in your mind: all in black, only your eyes showing through a small opening of fabric, calmly determined. You take your sword and slice through a fog-like mass of tension; it immediately dissipates. You know what to do for every anxiety, you have the tools and the skills to meet and defeat them.

Read. A good book preferably.

Transform your anxious energy into dance energy. Play your dance playlist, get up and groove. (Think I'll turn that on right now actually. Chair dancing is good too.)

Work on your life of art. If you can get past your preoccupations enough to start, it will distract you and be productive which will feel good. I know how hard it can be to start though. Deuparth gwaith ei ddechrau.

Watch TV. Sort of a catatonic approach, but hey, sometimes it's just the thing and that's OK. If you can find something that will make you laugh all the better. Or Dr. Who because it's just awesome.

If you need to do something stressful, do not procrastinate! Just do it. Otherwise you'll dwell on it which will make you more anxious.

Do yoga. Every day ideally. I like Rodney Yee's AM Yoga, a VHS tape I've had for years. It's short, fairly easy but still lets me push myself, and includes a little meditation to start and finish. My days are better when I start with this. This is more of a tone setter than a reaction-based approach.

Write! Duh. I hit publish and then realized this should really be on the list. With luck, this will make your feeds if I save it fast enough.

Do you have anything different you do when you're anxious or stressed out? I'm looking to expand my weaponry, particularly fast-acting, immediate actions.

So far, I find the ten minute walk the most effective thing, but it's still ten minutes and not that helpful if you're say in an office waiting for an appointment.

On a side note, I am so tired of getting bad news (and I'm ready for my friends to stop getting bad news too). First thing that illogically came to mind this afternoon was that it's like I must've drowned puppies in a past life. I love puppies! Heck, I clipped out the Peanuts strip from Sunday's paper. I love the panel of Snoopy yawning and the one where he's sitting on a bench: now there's a relaxation ninja!

A year ago on TTaT: A River in the Sky


  1. Breateh in to the count of ten. Breathe out to the count of ten. Repeat eight times.

    That's my secret.

  2. Those are all really great things!c

  3. I like that, The Honourable Husband. Adding the count and making it as long as ten will take focus to do, which will give your mind something else to concentrate upon. Also eminently portable. Dig it! Thanks for sharing.

    Thanks, Sizz. :)